Chris:

Sometimes in your life
It's good to lend a helping hand
To reach out to your brother
And your fellow man

Davina:

Just like the general public
Famous people see the suffering too
That's why there are so many
Charity songs

Pixie:

Raising money
And suffering people everywhere

Olly:

But what about us lot
Isn't it time for us to share

All:
[Chorus:]
Please buy this song
It's not for charity
There's no disaster
No global severity

Gary:

We'll just split the profits and you'll see

Chris:

We're in it for ourselves

Ed:

To make a shit load of money, yeah
I just want you to buy this song

Danny:

Don't be disappointed
We're not as rich as you may think

Olly:

Coz illegal downloads
Are killing us

Gary:

We need designer sunglasses
And to drive expensive cars
Charity will have to wait
Coz this time it's all about us

Robbie:

You might be thinking
How can this lot sleep at night
We've all got lovely mattresses
So we sleep alright

All:

We sleep very well

All:
[Chorus:]
Please buy this song
It's not for charity
There's no disaster
No global severity

Olly:

We'll just split the profits and you'll see

Chris:

We're in it for ourselves

Ed:

To make a shit load of money

Pixie:

Heated swimming pools
Cost more than you might think (Chris: I think)
I'm pleading with you people
Coz you're the missing link (Chris: link)

Gary:

By buying this song
And spending your cash
You could alleviate this pain
Now we really would like to buy our villa in Spain

Chris:

Or Portugal

All:
[Chorus:]
Please buy this song
It's not for charity
There's no disaster
No global severity

Pixie:

We'll just split the profits and you'll see

Chris:

We're in it for ourselves

Ed:

To make a shit load of money

All:

[Chorus:]
Please buy this song
It's not for charity
There's no disaster
No global severity

Gary:

We'll just split the profits and you'll see

Chris:

We're in it for ourselves

Ed:

To make a shit load of money

Chris:

We'll pocket all the profits

Ed:

And we're gonna be fucking loaded